Rec contr' Amor non es guirens lai on sos poclers, s'autra.

My sister went to the Snoop Dogg concert last night.

Boggles my mind.

We are *so* different - she's bubbly, skinny, blonde (and all that that entails), pleasant. Me? I'm cynical, curvy, argumentative and stubborn. Which I'm ok with - I've worked hard at all but the curvy (that's all nature baby!). Usually, I'm the one being held up as an example - you know, I don't drink and drive, I don't spend all my money on frivolous things, I have more than half a brain, all of that.

But last night? Someone actually said "Why can't you be more like you sister?"

To which I spit out my sip of beer, and laughed.

"Because then I would be her. Very Single White Female."

A.

My sister and I went out again last night, for dinner, and I was struck, yet again, by our differences.

To be fair, she also pointed them out, “Let me just do my hair, ok?” “I need to re-do my makeup.” “I just bought these boots, do they go with these jeans? Let me try them with my other jeans.” “Should I wear this shirt? Or this one?” “You’re going to wear that?”

My sister is the “dress up in really trendy clothes, with perfect hair and perfect make-up girl. I am the “Well, the jeans don’t have visible dirt, this shirt is clean…..let’s go!” type person.

And that is totally ok with me. That’s how I’m comfortable – a pair of old jeans, a t-shirt (usually with some strange message on it – ‘I put the R in rad’ ‘Love means zero in tennis’ whatever.) and a sweater. I ruffle my hair up, make sure I don’t have mascara pooling down my face, and off I go.

My sister’s “You’re going to wear that?” comment doesn’t bother me – I know it bothers her that I’m more into comfort than trends, but whatever. I wait patiently while she takes forever to do her hair and makeup, then off we go. I’d rather spend my money on something else (like rent) then live at home and wear all the newest fashions. I don’t need the adulation from other girls (You look fantastic!) or the comments from guys (You’re so skinny! You should eat more, here have some of my…..)

But I guess the thing is, is that I’ve accepted that she’s like that, and I’m the way I am. If I wasn’t comfortable with myself, her comments probably would bother me. I might actually try and compete, or feel like a shlub, instead of feeling like I’m being myself.

A.

So, it looks like I won't be able to get to my mom's house until tomorrow, later on in the day.

Let's all thank my very self-absorbed sister, who has my mom's car.

I don't suppose anyone on my flist with a car would be willing to drive me out this afternoon?  I'll give you money, booze and prezzies!

A.

Woohoo!

My mom and I bought our Creativ Festival tickets today. It looks like we'll be heading down on Friday October 20th, in the afternoon, staying in a hotel, then going to the festival on the Saturday.

I'm hoping to find some interesting bits of yarn -- maybe something in alpaca, or merino. Something different at any rate.

A.

And no that's not spelled wrong.

It currently looks like my mom and I will be in Toronto around October 20/21 for the Fiber/Sewing Festival (known as "Creativ Festival")

Her choice for this year's "mother-daughter bonding" experience. Side note: I think she might be over the mid-life crisis. She didn't pick tattoos, travelling to Europe, white water rafting or hot air ballooning - all activities that she has picked in the past

It's a ways a-way, I know, but thought I'd share my joy of FIBER. YARN. MORE YARN.

A.

This is the email that I got from my mom today. It's not a forward, it's not a joke, it's an honest-to-goodness email that my mom sent out. She went to the dentist yesterday, and he said that she had an abscess on/under/near a tooth, so today, I get this in my email:

"Abscess - see this word – if you had 2 you would have abscesses, now if it were 2 and belonged to someone else it would be abscesses’s but to prevent the snake hissing sound or a lisp sound they make you spell it abscesses’ . Tell me why they had to put a c in there. Probably the guy who was making up words that day did not have a chance to use the letter c, so whamo - come hell or high water I’m putting a c in a word today he thought. It was late and so he did not have time to think up a new word because his boss was on his butt about overtime. End of story."

Is it any wonder that I'm a little weird?

A.

My new haircut is causing a few family problems.

Specifically, my sister is, I believe, incredibly jealous at the moment.

She's used to being the centre of attention when we go out. She's used to guys falling all over her, and virtually ignoring me. She's used to getting the compliments, the flirting, everything. She's very much a "has to be alpha female" female.

I've never been terribly good at being the alpha female - or rather, I've never been terribly good and actively becoming/being the alpha female. I really don't care about my status on the totem pole - I just want to go out and have a good time, either by talking with people, or reading, or knitting. I just don't really have a preferance for how it turns out, you know? And when I had long hair, I'd just put it up in a pony tail and go. I sort of....blended in, or at least, stood out less when my sister was around. I'm not nearly as gregarious as she is, and not nearly as out-going and friendly.

But now that I have short hair, I get more attention. I get more compliments, and it's driving my sister nuts. She isn't dealing well with it at all, and it's showing itself in certain, odd, ways.

She's taken to flirting with my Luke, which is just strange, and butts into any conversation that doesn't include her. Yesterday, when someone complimented my hair, she said "I used to have my hair like that" in a pouty voice.

So what does this mean? Not much, just that I get to take centre stage is all.

A.

When I moved to Austria, my mom paid off my OSAP loans. It was about $6000 in total, give or take a few hundred, but not much more than that. (Yes, I was lucky in that that was all I owed, and that she paid it off for me.)

When I moved back home, she lent me money, about $1000, so that I could get an apartment. Over the past two years, she's lent me money here and there, bought me groceries, whatever.

So now, I figure I owe my mom roughly $9000. It's not a lot, I know, but the debt is there and I'd really like to start paying that off. She's been really generous, but she's also worried about money, so I'd like to be able to help her not worry.

But now, she wants to buy me glasses. My glasses aren't cheap. I have exceedingly horrible eyesight. My optomitrist, who works in a retirement community, and sees a lot of elderly people, says "You don't have the worst eyesight I've seen, but you're certainly up there." The frames are generally cheap, it's the lenses that are the kicker. The last time I got glasses, the lenses were $600. I have to get fine ground lenses, and anti-reflective glare coating on them, just to make them wearable.

I don't wear glasses, ever. I feel like I'm stuck behind a wall, and I can't interact with people properly. I have no periphery vision, and that kind of freaks me out. I don't like glasses, period. And I've explained this, and still she wants to buy me a new pair.

I say, buy me contacts! Buy me three pairs of contacts! But me....shelves and glass jars (my new decoratin theme, but that's another entry) and other bits and pieces that I want! Buy me anything else, but don't waste over $600 on glasses that I will rarely, if ever, wear.

A.

My mother's crazy. She got super excited yesterday, because the last Thursday of every month she gets 20% off at Shopper's Drug Mart

Because she's a senior.

Who gets excited about that? Who says "Yahooo! I'm a SENIOR now?" (Besides my mother, and seniors in high school.)

***

Oh an unrelated note, I have to go shopping sometime this weekend. I need summer shirts. Anyone want to join? I could also use an eye that's not mine. I need help picking out shirts that are for work, not for me. So, basically, I have to make sure that the tattoos are covered.

***

While I'm throwing money around, do I need a paid account?

S.

I went to bed early last night 'cause I had a wicked headache (tension, I'm sure) and my neck hurt. As did my throat. I feel asleep and missed two calls, but woke up for the third, although I didn't get to the phone on time. Turns out my sister was despereate to get a hold of me.

She thinks she's going to break up with her boyfriend, but she doesn't know how. They've been together for two years, and have lived together for a year now. She wondered how long C and I had been together, and if I had any suggestions on how to break up with P, her boyfriend. All I could say was "Well, I got an email......." which caused us both to laugh.

My mom sat us both down last year, and said that she doesn't want to meet anymore of our boyfriends, 'cause she meets them, and they're such nice guys, and then we break their hearts, and she feels bad for them. Which I feel isn't really fair. My sister dates before for forever -- well, maybe not forever, but 2 years is the standard. And me? Lately, I've been in looooooooong term relationships -- C for three years, and before that, M for a year. Which, given my proclivity for short relationships as a teenager, is a sign that maybe I'm an adult after all.

A.

Remember, this was for free:

* I have short fingers, therefor I am impatient.
* I'm smart
* I have a guardian angel
* I'm independent and don't like being told what to do.

I took my mom to the psychic fair last night, where we ran intosykomonkey and his girlfriend.  I had a reading done, but my mom didn't. 

Afterwards, we headed to Oreganos for dinner.  I'd never been there before, but the food was excellent.  I had the tortellini, and my mom had manicotti.  I got the leftovers.  After dinner we headed to Chapters for some book viewing.  Which turned into book buying for me.  I got Language Visible: Unraveling the Mystery Of the Alphabet from A to Z, and two other fiction books.  I'd been wanting to get Language Visible for quite a while, I finally found it for $6.99 in the Bargain Books section.  Wait long enough, everything goes on sale.

A.
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Judging by the nose bleed I got nearly as soon as I stood up this morning. I never get nose bleeds. Ever. I think I've had maybe two (not including this one) in my life. Plus it's raining out, and I have no bus tickets, and no change, so I have to walk to work. I'll bring a change of pants.

Yesterday my mom tells me that next year she's going to be 60. I think partly it was a hint to let me know that she's 59 this year (yesterday was her birthday.) I proceeded to think that she doesn't look old enough to be 59, or old enough to have a 27 year old daughter. But no one will say that to her 'cause I don't look old enough to be 27. Ok, I don't  act like I'm 27, but it's the same thing.  So everyone will think that my mother is in her 40's, and that I'm in my early 20's.

My mom has been telling people for years that she's 58.  Somewhere in her late 40's she forgot how old she was, and just went for 58.  For nearly 10 years she's been 58.  Finally, last year, they called her on it.  Turns out she was actually 58 that year.

I told my mom that for her 60th birthday, I was going to put a lot of pinkflamigo's on her lawn -- maybe 180 of them.  Anyway, that made me remember this recurring nightmare I used to have as a kid.  I was running around on the huge lawn, with a giant chasing me, and I was trying to get to the house.  And I was trying to hide under the pink flamingo's that were arranged on the lawn in rows -- kind of like they were planted there systematically.

It still makes me shudder.

A.

A customer left me a package of two bite brownies today. On purpose. He was going to mail two packages, decided on one, and left me the other 'cause I said I liked them. Or, could it have been because my co-workers and I were talking about my rack? Either way, I proceeded to eat half the bag, then got a stomach ache. Ah well, that's the way it goes.

My mom's birthday is coming up in two days. I'm taking her to the Psychic fair at the NAC on Sunday as her present. It's not as cool as the time I adopted her an elephant, but still it's cooler than a kick in the teeth, which was the other option. Ok, no, it wasn't, but that sounds cool.

I'm getting over $500 back for income tax -- I'm going clothes shopping! I still haven't, and I do need a few things. I think I'll go tomorrow, if it's not raining, or threatening to.

A.

I just got an email inviting me to Slovakia. Well, actually, it was an email saying the next time I'm in Europe, my friend and I will go to Slovakia, and swing by Vienna and pick up another friend. Very brightened my day.

My mom is coming in tonight, and I'm making dinner for us. I'm going to use NotMike's pork receipe. My roommate tells me I can cook it without ruining it.

My brother comes home from Austria today. And I bet, after years of my travelling and bringing him home things, he'll get me nothing. I bet you anything you want, sucker.

I'm doing a 1000 piece puzzle of the Parliment building in Budapest. There's lots of monochromatic sky pieces.

I don't know how many of you know this -- but one of my "goals" of "things to do before I'm 25" was to read War and Peace. I finished it three months before my 25th birthday, on the train between Prague and Vienna. Go me! I haven't accomplished very much since then.

I'm buying paint today, hopefully. My room has been primed for about three months now, it's about time I get around to painting it. I think I'm going to go for a yellow colour, or a pale beigey-yellow colour. I don't know. I'll decide when I get to the paint store.

I had to rat out a co-worker today. Not only has she been slacking, but she's also been ignorning customers, and, what's worse, is by not paying attention, things have been stolen. She's leaving in a few weeks, but this has happened before. She says she's leaving, she goes, then comes back several months later. Last time, I didn't speak up when stuff like this started happening, this time I had to.

The people upstairs, who moved in only a few short months ago, are moving out. They're showing the apartment, as they keep informing me. "Can you turn your music down? We're showing the apartment." I don't mind turning it down, of course, but it's not very loud to begin with. If I leave the room, I can't hear it, and I live in a small apartment. Oh well, maybe whoever moves in there will not move furniture late at night.

That's a lot of information to get in a short while, isn't it?

 A.

a beer to those who can name the band of the title.

My mom came into the city tonight. She came over to dinner, then for a brief trip to Wal-mart and Chapters.

It's funny, but I find comfort in the stacks of books. It's sort of a whole different world in there for me. I'd love to have a room that was covered in bookcases, filled to the brim with books. I mean, ok, my apartment already sort of looks like that, but just the idea of a very comfortable room, with a large overstuffed armchair, and books, thousands of books in every description possible -- *sigh* That's heaven. That's comfort.

Anyway, my mom and I kind of danced around the last week. We touched on it, certainly. It was a major event in our lives and there's no getting around that. But we tended to talk around the issue -- about people who came to the wake, things they said ("Your children are all thin! And tall!" "My but you have such beautiful good-looking children, all of them." "So I hear your oldest is moving out East.") food that is still filling my mother's fridge ("I don't need another shepard's pie, and certianly no more dessert!") stuff like that.

As she put it to the funeral director at the wake: We're a small family, but we're mighty. We'll heal, we just have to give it time.

A.

but only because I was going to post something on thursday night. Or friday night. Either way, I was going to post while sober.

I'm not now.

wheeeee.

I went out with my Russian roommate, and we had an interesting conversation, re: wakes and funerals. 'Cause I'm Irish, and on Friday, after the wake? Bunches of people came over to my mom's house and stood around in the kitchen/dining room, talking. Ok, and asking which daughter I was, and which one of us travelled.....I lied and said her, so I didn't have to interact with people (I'm not good at that), and I'm really off topic now, aren't I? This is why I was going to post sober.

Anyway, I'm going to end here with the topic going nowhere, and no point in sight. I like things that way......

A.

This will be an all-over-the-place entry.

( funeral )
( roomie )
( grad school )
( smoking )

So there you have it.

A.

We in the extended mathowny family believe that you *must* give more presents than you receive. Always. Every year we frantically attempt to out-gift one another, going bigger, better, more, pricier, prettier, and just plain cooler.

This year I piled my momma's car full of prezzies -- leaving just enough room for me, my momma, my sis's dog, and, as a last thought, my roomie. And laundry, but that's a given. And I thought "HA! That'll teach 'em all!" and "great, I should have more than enough room coming home. No dog, less presents."

Boy, was I *vastly* mistaken. DAMN THEM! They out-gifted me! There was less room in the car coming home. Christ. What does a girl have to do in this family?

Coolest gift: Wine from the house of commons. Mmmmmm....government wine. :)

Gift that should never have been given to me: furniture that needs to be put together. I mean, hello? I can barely work nail clippers.

Gift that made me squeel: Buffy, season 7. *sigh* Now I can do a Buffy week, and watch every episode from every season.

Gift that made me laugh: "Mr Right. (when you need him). A little doll that has speech bubbles, like "I'm sorry, you're right." "Can I take you shoe shopping, sweetie?" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. *wipes eyes*

Gift that will have me bouncing for weeks: $30 in Tim Hortons gift certificates. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

And tomorrow, I will go boxing day shopping, and I hope to all and every god out there that I get a jump on my competition. Next year, I will out-gift, out-give and out-wrap the lot of them! *shakes fist*

Merry Christmas all, and have a tip-top Teht.

A. -- hehe. Tip-top Teht. hehe.